theoretical study of tone
By: Adeshinah Adewuyi
As a human being we have different categories of feelings such as
- Feelings of love = teasing tone = wooing words
- Feelings of anger = annoying tone = harsh voice = offensive words
- Feelings of sorry = nostalgic tone = low voice = pleading words
- Feelings of confusion = anxiety tone = low voice etc
There is no way that we’re going to talk about relationship that we won’t talk about human, and human is logical to an extent that what we say or do sometimes is not what really comes from our mind.
Sometimes NO is not always NO, not every LEAVE ME ALONE means that you should leave him or her alone, not every I DON’T WANT YOU ANYMORE Means that you should go.
- you’ve to consider his/her tone: is it the normal tone to say such words? you will now use the tone to interpret his/her feelings so as to get exactly what he/she really mean. For example if she romantically say NO to kiss, the tone will be teasing tone equal to feelings of love and probably we have subtract the words and focus on the tone. If we now use tone to get the real feelings, it means that the NO means YES (remember that we’re talking about theoretical study of tone)
You can see that it’s easy but remember that pretend is also one of the characteristics of human and what if he/she pretend and you can’t study his/her real feelings from his/her tone?
what is pretense
I define Pretense as an act of hidden the real feelings or giving a false appearance for a purpose.
Note that pretense is faking a feelingsfood it cannot last for a long time(that’s why many relationship fail after 3month to 5month) and the mood for pretense will be different from that of the real feelings
You can’t compare someone that pretend to be happy whenever he/she see you, with someone that’s really happy whenever he or she see you because their mood and action towards you will be different
- You too pretend as if you don’t hear anything
- Studying the tone is not necessary now because someone that want to pretend will also find the right tone to use
- Study his/her mood: you can easily know his/her mood by looking directly to his eyes for some minutes
- Evaluate his/her actions: what he/she pretend to get from you will always be his/her focus or target
- Give him/her the chance to think twice(whatever he/she says or do now is what he/she really mean)
- You can now decide on what next to do
That is if he/she pretend and the feelings is not straightforward